P.j. O'rourke Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old P.j. O'rourke quotes, P.j. O'rourke sayings, and P.j. O'rourke proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.'

Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system. P.J. O'Rourke
Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work, and then get elected and prove it. P.J. O'Rourke
Fish is the only food that is considered spoiled once it smells like what it is. P.J. O'Rourke
Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system. P.J. O'Rourke
The sport of skiing consists of wearing three thousand dollars' worth of clothes and equipment and driving two hundred miles in the snow in order to stand around at a bar and get drunk. P.J. O'Rourke
Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them. P.J. O'Rourke
Drugs have taught an entire generation of American kids the metric system. P.J. O'Rourke
Any terrorism is an attack on libertarian values. P.J. O'Rourke
The Democrats are the party of government activism, the party that says government can make you richer, smarter, taller, and get the chickweed out of your lawn. Republicans are the party that says government doesn't work, and then get elected and prove it. P.J. O'Rourke
Everybody wants to save the earth; no one wants to help mom do the dishes. P.J. O'Rourke
The American political system is like fast food - mushy, insipid, made out of disgusting parts of things and everybody wants some. P.J. O'Rourke
One of the annoying things about believing in free will and individual responsibility is the difficulty of finding somebody to blame your problems on. And when you do find somebody, it's remarkable how often his picture turns up on your driver's license. P.J. O'Rourke
The weirder you're going to behave, the more normal you should look. It works in reverse, too. When I see a kid with three or four rings in his nose, I know there is absolutely nothing extraordinary about that person. P.J. O'Rourke
These days, the honeymoon is rehearsed much more often than the wedding. P.J. O'Rourke
Golf combines two favorite American pastimes, taking long walks and hitting things with a stick. P.J. O'Rourke
A man who drinks in a healthy, fit, and self-approving manner will mix vodka with yogurt and get tangled in the Nautilus machine trying to kiss his own ass. P.J. O'Rourke
The American political system is like fast food— mushy, insipid, made out of disgusting parts of things...and everybody wants some. P.J. O'Rourke
Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. P.J. O'Rourke
I found out that all the important lessons in life are contained in the three rules for achieving a perfect golf swing: 1. Keep your head down. 2. Follow through. 3. Be born with money. P.J. O'Rourke
There's one more terrifying fact about old people; I'm going to be one soon. P.J. O'Rourke
Then proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to. P.J. O'Rourke
You can always reason with a barnyard animal too for all the good it does. P.J. O'Rourke
Zen martini: A martini with no vermouth at all. And no gin, either P.J. O'Rourke
You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going. P.J. O'Rourke
A hat should be taken off when greeting a lady, and left off the rest of your life. Nothing looks more stupid than a hat. P.J. O'Rourke
There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well, please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences. P.J. O'Rourke