Funny Stress Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old funny stress quotes, funny stress sayings, and funny stress proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

If stress burned calories, I'd be a supermodel. Anonymous
The field of consciousness is tiny. It accepts only one problem at a time. Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
There cannot be a stressful crisis next week. My schedule is already full. Henry Kissinger
The time to relax is when you don't have time for it. Sydney J. Harris
Stress is basically a disconnection from the earth, a forgetting of the breath. Natalie Goldberg
Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet. Anonymous
Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it. Lily Tomlin
It's not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it. Hans Selye
It is not a daily increase, but a daily decrease. Hack away the inessentials. Bruce Lee
The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over another. William James
There is more to life than increasing its speed. Mahatma Gandhi
Our anxiety does not come from thinking about the future, but from wanting to control it. Kahlil Gibran
Resistance creates suffering. Stress happens when your mind resists what is. The only problem in your life is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds. Dan Millman
Stress is caused by being 'here' but wanting to be 'there.' Eckart Tolle
If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity. I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it. George Burns
In times of stress, the best thing we can do for each other is to listen with our ears and our hearts and to be assured that our questions are just as important as our answers. Fred Rogers
You can't always control what goes on outside, but you can always control what goes on inside. Wayne Dyer
Your head is feeling achy, filled with worries and with stress / sometimes you question if today you truly gave your best / It throbs and it runs, it hurts and it pounds / at times you feel that it never calms down. Pamela Macdonald
A stress, say, of a megadyne / That tension I would sooner suffer / Than meet again with such a duffer! James Clerk Maxwell
'Tis war and stress, with never a pause to mourn for a stout heart gone / Till the souls of the Nation Builders shall know that the work is done. George Essex Evans
White Star of Womanhood, whose rays / Thro’ years of peace and years of stress / Shed wide o’er all thy people’s ways / The light of nobleness George Essex Evans
Life is stress by definition. Paul Attanasio
It's like every time I think about how stressed I am, I just end up more stressed. I'm like a big, growing snowball of nerves. Michael Dante DiMartino
I mean, what job out there doesn't stress you out of your mind? Carl W. Adams
I'm not stressed beyond the stress induced by telling you how stressed I am. David Shore
Wish we could turn back time, to the good old days / When our momma sang us to sleep but now we're stressed out Tyler Joseph
O beautiful for pilgrim feet / Whose stern impassioned stress / A thoroughfare of freedom beat / Across the wilderness! Mormon Tabernacle Choir
Changes, conflicts, and upheavals in some of society's basic values also contribute to the general experience of stress. Dorothy H.G. Cotton
The experience of stress is defined first by the person's realization that something is at stake. Cary L. Cooper
Over the past 2 decades there has been an increasing belief that the experience of stress has undesirable consequences for health. Annabel Broome
Stress may affect health but, at the same time, a state of ill health can both act as a significant source of stress and also sensitize the person to other sources of stress by reducing their ability to cope. Annabel Broome
Social support can help you de-stress as it accumulates synthesis of the hormone Oxycontin, which fights stress and anxiety. Shining Universe Energy
Fight stress by doing a repetitive, bilateral and rhythmic activity, which functions in a similar manner as meditation. Shining Universe Energy
Research has shown that the process of planting and growing can help relieve stress and anxiety. Shining Universe Energy
Stress and depression are also triggered by the desire to please others, say your parents, co-workers, friends, spouse, or children. Shining Universe Energy
Plan your activities and thoughts using a to-do list, to reduce stress while boosting productivity. Shining Universe Energy
Stress is a forerunner of several physical ailments and mental illnesses is increasing our vulnerability all the time. Chandru Gidwani
Stress can serve as a powerful motivating force for creativity and achievement. Chandru Gidwani
Not all stress is bad. We sometimes hear people sat 'I work better under pressure or 'I thrive on competition'. Chandru Gidwani
You have to remember that most stress reactions are self-induced. Chandru Gidwani
The right frame of mind is what is termed 'calm energy'- that is, a state of high motivation with no fear or anxiety. Chandru Gidwani
Studies show that laughter reduces stress, lowers blood pressure, elevates mood, and boosts the immune system. Alex A. Lluch
Incorporate a good chuckle into your day to reduce stress and promote relaxation and happiness. Alex A. Lluch
Hobbies have been medically proven to reduce stress and increase happiness. Alex A. Lluch
If you find yourself devoting inordinate chunks to time to work, or bringing stress from work home with you, ask yourself how it is affecting your relationships. Alex A. Lluch
In Eastern philosophies, stress is considered to be an absence of inner peace. Brian Luke Seaward
I Western culture. stress can be described as a loss of emotional control. Brian Luke Seaward