Bill Watterson Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old Bill Watterson quotes, Bill Watterson sayings, and Bill Watterson proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

That's the whole problem with science. You've got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder. Bill Watterson
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. Bill Watterson
When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back. Bill Watterson
A box of new crayons! Now they're all pointy, lined up in order, bright and perfect. Soon they'll be a bunch of ground down, rounded, indistinguishable stumps, missing their wrappers and smudged with other colors. Sometimes life seems unbearably tragic. Bill Watterson
Did you ever wonder if the person in the puddle is real, and you're just a reflection of him? Bill Watterson
Repetition is the death of magic. Bill Watterson
Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around. Bill Watterson
If people sat outside and looked at the stars each night, I'll bet they'd live a lot differently. Bill Watterson
There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want. Bill Watterson
It must be hard to cook if you anthropomorphisize your vegetables. Bill Watterson
In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks. Bill Watterson
Weekends don’t count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless. Bill Watterson
If good things lasted forever, would we appreciate how precious they are? Bill Watterson
Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around. Bill Watterson
A day can really slip by when you're deliberately avoiding what you're supposed to do. Bill Watterson
Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous? Bill Watterson
If you can't control your peanut butter, you can't expect to control your life. Bill Watterson
Mothers are the necessity of invention. Bill Watterson
You can draw a penguin on a toilet reading The New York Times and it's adorable, but try doing it with an adult male character, and it's disgusting. Bill Watterson
Rainy days should be spent at home with a cup of tea and a good book. Bill Watterson
Shutting off the thought process is not rejuvenating; the mind is like a car battery - it recharges by running. Bill Watterson
So, what’s it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond that, I don’t recommend it. Bill Watterson
God put me on this Earth to accomplish a certain number of things. Right now, I am so far behind I will never die. Bill Watterson
When birds burp, it must taste like bugs. Bill Watterson
I won't eat any cereal that doesn't turn the milk purple. Bill Watterson
Until you stalk and overrun, you cannot devour anyone. Bill Watterson
It's a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while it's light out. Bill Watterson
I like these cold, gray winter days. Days like these let you savor a bad mood. Bill Watterson
The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. Bill Watterson
If people sat outside and looked at the stars each night, I'll bet they'd live a lot differently. Bill Watterson