Jarod Kintz Sayings and Quotes
Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old jarod kintz quotes, jarod kintz sayings, and jarod kintz proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.
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Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.
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The year you were born marks only your entry into the world. Other years where you prove your worth, they are the ones worth celebrating.
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I went fishing, and I caught a minnow. If you think that's tiny, you should see the bait I was using. What micro fish could resist my love?
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I want to go to sleep in my time machine and wake up eight hours in the future.
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Pride must be a summer thing, because it comes before the fall.
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Teamwork: I love the idea of all for one especially if that one is me.
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I hate fake people. You know what I'm talking about. Mannequins.
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Drinking coffee is like drinking an inverse yawn. I prefer mine with two spoonfuls of ?I?m listening.?
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College has given me the confidence I need to fail.
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Design is body language for inanimate objects.
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I find wisdom in the waves. Goodbye is a hello to a life without you.
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Teamwork: I love the idea of all for one — especially if that one is me.
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I can tell if two people are in love by how they hold each other's hands, and how thick their sanitation gloves are.
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Whether you live to be 50 or 100 makes no difference, if you made no difference in the world.
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My left hand is my bad hand. I spank it with my right hand. You might call it clapping, but I call it discipline.
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If I could lick the sunset, I'll bet it would taste like Neapolitan ice cream.
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The sun would be better than a flashlight, except it doesn't work at night. It probably needs to recharge its batteries from running all day.
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The American Dream is to not have to work, so with unemployment at record levels, you'd think more people would be excited and grateful for the government intervention that got us to this glorious economic point.
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My drug of choice is love. Sure, I've tried other drugs, but no other drug gets both the dealer and user high from every transaction.
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It's always sunny in the Sunshine State. Except for at night.
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My love for you is like a Florida sunset. Orange, coral, pink, and lavender, it exists to warm your heart through the inevitable darkness.
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With my last breath, I'll exhale my love for you. I hope it's a cold day, so you can see what you meant to me.
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My two favorite colors of the rainbow are gold and leprechaun.
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I don't understand people who don't touch their pets. Their cat or dog is called a pet for a reason.
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Cats are like walking brooms you can actually comfortably cuddle with.
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Obesity isn't as cool as it used to be, back in the earlier centuries. Before it was a reflection on your gross income, and now it's just gross.
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A part-time worker is fully employed, half the time. In other words, they are part-time unemployees.
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I called to tell her I loved her, which was smart, because if I'd have done it in person, I'd have caught her with another man. I don't care if he was my clone, it isn't right and it pisses me off. I was backstabbed by myself.
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For me, it's not about winning an award. It's also about not even being nominated
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A mirror is like my own personal reality TV show where I'm both the star and only viewer. I've got to get my ratings up.
