Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous
old George Burns quotes, George Burns sayings, and George Burns proverbs, collected over the years from a variety
of sources.'
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.George Burns
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You can't help getting older, but you don't have to get old..George Burns
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Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made.George Burns
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I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.George Burns
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Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there.George Burns
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Sex can be fun after eighty, after ninety, and after lunch!George Burns
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If you live to the age of a hundred, you have it made because very few people die past the age of a hundred.George Burns
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Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.George Burns
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It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can't remember if it's the thirteenth or the fourteenth.George Burns
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Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.George Burns
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Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there.George Burns
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Love is a lot like a backache, it doesn't show up on X-rays, but you know it's there.George Burns
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First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.George Burns
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Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.George Burns
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Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.George Burns
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If I had taken my doctor's advice and quit smoking when he advised me to, I wouldn't have lived to go to his funeral.George Burns
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I smoke cigars because at my age if I don't have something to hang on to I might fall down.George Burns
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By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.George Burns
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By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.George Burns
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Don't stay in bed unless you can make money in bed.George Burns
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Be quick to learn and wise to know.George Burns
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There will always be a battle between the sexes because men and women want different things. Men want women and women want men.George Burns
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A good martini, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman..or a bad woman. Depending on how much happiness you can stand.George Burns
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People ask me what I'd most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. I tell them, a paternity suit.George Burns
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Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.George Burns
1
Love is a lot like a backache; It doesn’t show up on X-Rays, but you know it’s there.George Burns
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By the time you're eighty years old you've learned everything. You only have to remember it.George Burns
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I was introduced to a beautiful young lady as a man in his nineties. Early nineties, I insisted.George Burns
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Smartness runs in my family. When I went to school I was so smart my teacher was in my class for five years.George Burns
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Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair.George Burns