Steven Wright Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old Steven Wright quotes, Steven Wright sayings, and Steven Wright proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.'

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your life. Steven Wright
I was trying to daydream but my mind kept wandering. Steven Wright
I've been doing a lot of abstract painting lately, extremely abstract. No brush, no canvas, I just think about it. Steven Wright
You can't have everything. Where would you put it? Steven Wright
I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. Steven Wright
Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time. Steven Wright
I've been doing a lot of abstract painting lately, extremely abstract. No brush, no paint, no canvas, I just think about it. Steven Wright
I went to a restaurant that served 'breakfast at any time.' I ordered French toast during the Renaissance. Steven Wright