Evan Esar Sayings and Quotes

Below you will find our collection of inspirational, wise, and humorous old Evan Esar quotes, Evan Esar sayings, and Evan Esar proverbs, collected over the years from a variety of sources.

Some people can handle their liquor, while others go off the handle. Evan Esar
A check for liquor is not a check for liquor. Evan Esar
A little liquor makes you lose your inhibitions, a lot makes you give inhibitions. Evan Esar
An engagement ring is a piece of jewelry that usually turns a right-handed girl into a left handed one. Evan Esar
Opportunity knocks for every man, but a woman gets a ring. Evan Esar
During courtship a girl is unpredictable until she gets an engagement ring then she shows her hand. Evan Esar
The best way for a woman to preserve her wedding ring is to dip it in dishwater three times a day Evan Esar
When a young man gives his girl a ring, he gives it with all his heart and most of his savings. Evan Esar
The man who invented the alarm clock believed people slept too long or worked too little. Evan Esar
The only thing worse than hearing the alarm clock is not hearing it. Evan Esar
Some men have alarm clocks; others have their wives elbows. Evan Esar
Of all daylight-saving plans, the best by far is an alarm clock. Evan Esar
When an alarm clock wakes a man up, it makes him feel not like the early bird, but like the worm. Evan Esar
An alarm clock is a device that wakes you up just in time to go back to sleep. Evan Esar
What this country needs is an alarm clock that can be set on Saturday night to ring Monday morning. Evan Esar
The man who invented the alarm clock probably did more than anyone else to arouse the working classes. Evan Esar
An alarm clock is built with a mechanism to scare the daylights into you. Evan Esar
Take a lesson from the clock; it passes the time by keeping its hands busy. Evan Esar
An office clock is rarely stolen, probably because everyone watches it. Evan Esar
No matter how fast a clock may run, it always winds up at the same place. Evan Esar
In some homes the clock, like father, is always wrong. Evan Esar
A clock is a modest piece of furniture that covers its face with its hands, and runs down its own works. Evan Esar
If a fee were charged to see the sun rise, almost everybody would be up to watch it. Evan Esar
One man's sunset is another man's sunrise Evan Esar
Calling anything foolproof seems to take a lot for granted. Evan Esar
The honeymoon is over when the bride who took her husband for better or for worse, starts taking him for granted. Evan Esar
In all affairs it's a healthy thing not and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted. Evan Esar
Argumentative people have one thing in common: they are always ready to dispute an indisputable fact. Evan Esar
The most common argument against marriage is the one between husband wife. Evan Esar
When you win an argument with your wife, the argument is not over. Evan Esar